You are going to meet a very important client for lunch. What do you do? If you are anything like Anna the first job is to ensure the outside you is perfect, well dressed, matching clothes, clean shoes, washed in your favourite soaps, perfume. Check yourself many, many times in the mirror, Ask your partner (numerous times),” Do I look right”? “Is everything OK”? Basically, nothing is left to chance. The inside you has been studying the information you feel is important. You feel on top of your subject but slightly nervous. You pull out all the stops to ensure that the person you are meeting will get full benefit of your total attention, love and generosity. Again, nothing is left to chance.

To be more successful, to be outstanding in a world of successful people you need to think, feel and be professional. Anna always ensures she is more informed, more prepared than anyone in the office.

To her losing is not an option. She has to win. She remembers the time, five years ago, when she was not in the top 50 of the top salespersons in her organisation and did not go on the annual, all expenses paid, trip to Bermuda. Instead she got a bottle of champagne, special delivery, from a colleague with a note, ‘Sorry you didn’t make it’. She was seething and vowed never not to make it again.

So she sat down, thought and thought and discovered the secrets of winning. The secrets of success.

I’m sure you already know the secrets. Confidence and Preparation and Knowledge. Anna started to prepare like she has never prepared before. Not only did she know all about her products. She started to know all there was to know about her established clients, potential clients and what made them buy the product and what made them buy from her, the competition, etc etc etc.. Everything she did had been done before except:- She learned that the only way to be a very successful person —to constantly win— is to conquer your waste thoughts.

Anna realised that the what stopped her performing was not the knowledge or the confidence or the preparation. It was failing to applying the knowledge she had. Allowing her wasteful, negative views of herself to dominate.
Anna had to learn to change her thoughts. Stop the waste and negativity. Take responsibility for her life.

Most self help books and articles she read told her to:

“STOP your waste thoughts or STOP self defeating behaviour… be focussed on your aim and objective………..eradicate waste and negative thoughts that stop you from achieving……..”

The problem is that she found it difficult to STOP her waste thoughts. In fact the more she tried to STOP thinking negatively the more she thought negatively.

Anna did more research and found another way. Instead of STOPPING waste thoughts success lay in changing her thoughts.
So now all Anna had to do was change her thoughts.
But How do you do that?
Anna started each day with the following five minute meditation where she reinforced her talent by focussing on giving herself: Total attention, love and generosity.

Sit quietly, relaxed (put on some relaxing music if you wish):

Just sit with yourself, quietly, relaxed. Be generous to yourself, give yourself total attention and love.

Become aware of your thoughts. Letting the thoughts of what you: ‘ should’, ‘ought’ and/or ‘must’ do, fade away.

Don’t be drawn in to acting or listening.

Gradually you will reach a place of calm. Stay in that place. Don’t hurry away.

Let yourself be taken on a journey.

Enjoy the peace and calm that is beginning to waft over your body and mind.
Concentrate on the good periods of your life. What you did right. The successful periods. The times when everything worked for you. What were your thoughts then?

Relax. If you fall asleep it doesn’t matter. You need it. Just give yourself time.

Anna focussed on the good and positive things in her life. Gradually she noticed that her thoughts and behaviour had changed. It didn’t happen all at once. It came erratically……in spurts. But it happened.

Try it for just three or four days. Focus on giving yourself: Total attention, love and generosity. Like Anna, we are sure, you will experience so much benefit. In fact you will even start to see changes in your behaviour. Try it!

What we are saying is the opposite to general convention. You don’t start by making effort to stop your negative and wasteful thoughts. You start by behaving in a generous, open, loving way to yourself and then your behaviour changes. Don’t shut yourself away in a box. Open yourself up and allow everything to flow in. Give yourself total attention, See yourself with love, be generous with the time you give to yourself and you will feel the change in you. It works.

Changing your thoughts will give you the edge you desire. It will give you the competitive edge over competitors. All you have to do is put it into practice. Remember: Nothing is left to chance.

Good Luck

Graham and Julie

To improve your intuition, initiative and energy levels. Please go to:
http://www.desktop-meditation.com It’s free.

Seeking improved performance at work? Wishing you could finally achieve your sports-related goals? Merely looking for a way to get more out of everything you do? What follows are five basic skills (basic in that all top achievers know these skills and apply them in some form on a weekly basis) that will dramatically improve your performance.

1. Visualization

Some people are more “visual learners” than others, but most everybody can benefit from the utilization of applied visualization in their lives. It is important to understand, though, that visualization is NOT the same as daydreaming. Think of visualization as power daydreaming. The results you get from the two activities are drastically different, though their process may be similar. The four keys to visualization are:

A. Use all your senses- the more senses you bring in to your visualization experiences, the more “real” it becomes for your brain. Remember-the brain seeks to make the “outside” or external reality congruent with the “inside” reality. Make that inside reality one that is vivid.

B. Be clear- make certain your outcomes are clearly set in your visualization. Do you succeed? By how much? How well do you perform?

C. Be positive (in your outcomes)-this might seem like a no-brainer, but it is important to make certain that your visualization is always positive with regards to tone and outcome.

D. Do it often!-as it has been said, repetition is the mother of skill. The more you do something the right way, the better you become at it.

2. Goal Setting

Most people subscribe to a well-known method for setting goals: Choose a goal, and make a daily to-do list towards attainment of that goal. Don’t do this. Most people fail in their goal setting for that very reason. Why? Life gets in the way! Daily tasks, crises, emergencies, etc. steal our time and leave nothing for achievement of our ambitions. Some ways to improve your goal setting abilities include:

A. Make certain your goals are in line with your dreams

B. Make sure that your goals inspire you (the “get-out-of-bed-early” test)

C. Invoke specific strategy (what you want to do) and planning (how you will do it)

D. Get your priorities straight, and get them on your schedule. Get them done first, before anything else.

E. Do these things on a weekly, not daily, basis.

3. Focus and Concentration

What is the difference between focus and concentration? I define focus in broad, behavioral terms. Focus is the center of our life interests and activities). Concentration is more narrow, and deals with cognition. It is the directed attention of mental activities toward a single point of reference.

So how can this help you? Understand that success requires a broad focus on a goal (outcome) with subsequent narrow attention to it’s attainment as time progresses. Geology, for example, teaches us great lessons about focus and concentration. Geology is merely the study of pressure and time. Given enough time and specific factors (focus), various geological formations are formed. Learn what geologists know: To achieve your goals, you will need to have a goal, and stay flexible in your approaches toward that end. Utilize concentration when specific instances occur in your life that will lead you closer to your goal.

4. Mental Toughness

Mental toughness is not what you think it is. Mental toughness is simple to define and difficult to execute (or everybody would be tough). Here are the keys:

A. Resiliency (the ability to bounce back)

B. Optimism (the ability to see the good in situations and events)

C. Proactive (the ability to act upon your environment)

Resiliency is important because everybody fails. The higher up you go in life, the more chances you will have had to fail. What is important, however, is how you respond to life’s inevitable obstacles and potholes. Optimism is simply a better choice than pessimism, as it leads to hope rather than despair. There is always a positive lean on a situation if you are willing to look hard and long enough. Finally, being proactive puts you in the driver’s seat to achieving your goals, as you are not at the mercy of your environment. Act or be acted upon.

5. Perspective

Perspective is the key to mental health. It allows for proper life balance, and allows for simultaneous realism and optimism. To get a better sense of perspective, realize that there are only three things in life that you can truly control: Your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Focus your energy on those three things. Monitor what you allow yourself to think about and focus on. Doing so will allow you to gain true perspective, which is always grounded in reality, but hints of better things to come.

Copyright (2005) Leif H. Smith. All Rights Reserved.

Performance expert Leif H. Smith, Psy.D, is the president of Personal Best Consulting, a consulting firm located in Hilliard, Ohio. To learn more tips and techniques to immediately improve performance in your life and to sign up for his FREE monthly advice newsletter, visit http://www.personalbestconsulting.com